A Match Made in Hell, or Signs-of-the-Apocalypse-Volume-3,768
Dear God, this is the kind of shit that turns little kids into demons… all of the insurrection in the world, all of the injustice, this shit… it’s all because of this shit.. but no really… these guys make gangsta rap look like the little kiddie hymns in church that say “shine your light on the world,” … or whatever it is they say… if I see one more set of butt cheeks I’m gonna lose it… how fucking horrible is this? Well, honestly, I gotta give it to these guys… this shit is kinda funny, ya know? For the relevance, this video has a ton of creativity, but in reality, I think I just love that scepter… I want one. The Col. turned me on to this one, and hey, thanks, Col.!
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Now, let me introduce you to my newest Vengeful Videorama Object-of-Hate… Miss KM… She’s so horrible she defies my abilities to come up with something creative and mean to moniker her by… this is what I’ve already written, in the past months upon finding nothing but her shitty videos all over my screen, which I must say almost made me quit the idea of fucking commenting on videos altogether… (am I mad??? Is Lady Z almost destroyed by this shit??? Well, I haven’t watched a music video since, until being inspired by Chuggo…) Anyway, I was going to write some bitchy review about this brand new barbie doll in the musical toy box, and then I decided not to torture my readers. You should thank me. (notice that I DON’T post the videos for your very survival… I want people to retain the desire to watch music videos altogether, which could very well be obliterated by watching one of her’s…. So if you really want to see this sign-of-the-apocalypse, you may of course go to YouTube or Vh1 dot com and have a look. I realize there are some types who want to ogle her shiny lips, but watch at your own risk.
Kylie Minogue- “2 Hearts”- She wants to be Marilyn, Madonna, Britney, Gwen, Amy, Blondie, and thats exactly the fucking problem. She’s ripping on everyone, and it doesn’t hold up to 2008, sorry. As much as she’s supposed to be the next big thing, there is fucking nothing new about this music, and as a result I totally hate it. She doesn’t need money obviously, she’s got plenty of that, but she definitely needs a new image and a new producer. (And the fact that I have nothing else to say about this doesn’t say that I’m a shitty writer, it says that she’s the worst of the shit of the shit of new music videos and new music period).
Kylie Minogue- (Some lame Music Video) Will it ever fucking end? I seriously can’t take any more of this silly pink girl. She’s everything horrible about the spice girls rolled into one. (Except Posh, who is obviously doing something right–she’s fucking married to the hottest man alive…) Anyway, gag me with a fucking piece of bubblegum and throw me back into junior high and my 13 year old life! I would rather write about the cheesiness of the fucking Lisa Frank flowery cheetah-inspired notebooks of that time period than this derivative big-music-biz princess.