Bitches Are WAY Better than Ballgowns

Written by  //  February 15, 2012  //  Televised Entertainment in Review  //  No comments

Forget any other awards show this year – The Westminster Dog Show is AWESOME

Oh Westminster, you are and always will be my favorite awards show ever. Not only will we never have to see a piece of shit like Chris “Beat her Down” Brown win an award and not be booed off the stage, but Westminster just may be the last place on earth besides Donnybrook that’s so snooty and elitist they’re beyond Martha Stewart’s influence.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First, I have to say – I was rooting for Malachy ever since I first saw him waddle his way into my heart on Monday when he won Best in Breed and Best in Group, Toy – I’m so very happy to say a huge CONGRATULATIONS to the cutest dog I’ve ever seen grace Westminster – the one and only Malachy the Pekingese.

Don’t know what I’m talking about? Why is Malachy so awesome? Well for one, he’s got the same name as my future unborn son I may never have because children creep me out, and for two – remember the doggie-ottoman in Beauty and the Beast? That’s TOTALLY Malachy!!!

He took the grand prize of Best in Show at the 136th Westminster Dog Show yesterday, beating out a ton of adorably fierce contenders: 

I’m dying right now from all the cute, and Fauntleroy’s taken over my swooning couch after seeing all the hot pieces of ass that strutted by the screen the last two nights – sorry, too much? Forgive me, I’ve been up all night at the Westminster After-Party – you think people went nuts at the Grammy’s? The Grammy’s got nothing on the rager’s these people throw.

Congratulations to all the contenders for making it to the biggest dog event of the year, and to all the proud dog-mom’s and dad’s, their trainers, and everyone who took home awards last night. But most especially, congrats, little Malachy – you are the cutest ball of hair I’ve ever laid eyes on (Shh… don’t tell Faunty!)

About the Author

Alistair Blake Arabella

“Alistair Blake Arabella” is the brainchild of entertainment writer and managing editor Vanessa “2 Fingers” Berben . If you’re missing the latest refill of your Dexedrine prescription, there’s a good a chance Alistair’s in your bathroom and has already crushed it up and snorted it. Now be a good little kitten and fetch her drink. If you’d like to receive the hallowed word of Alistair drop a line to AskAlistair@gmail.com – you just may be in the next episode of “Ask Alistar” if you’re very, very lucky.

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