Westword Music Writer Cory Casciato

Written by  //  June 9, 2010  //  Concerned Interview, The Table  //  4 Comments

As a much nerdier precursor to next weekend’s Westword Music Showcase, Geeks Who Drink is hosting this weekend’s Westword Music Knowcase: a place for music trivia nerds to put their encyclopedic minds to the test in a fierce all-music round. Anyone can play. The prize? Respek. And a cash prize, but who needs that? To participate, just show up Sunday at 3 pm in the Irish Snug with $5 per player, and don’t have more than six team members. Just don’t!

And who knows–maybe you and your little cobbled-together team will beat Westword‘s team, or Twist & Shout‘s, or even Donnybrook’s team (uncontrollable mirthful laughter). Donnybrook has created a super-team made up of bloggers from Donnybrook, Fuel/Friends, and Denver’s Best Blog (as according to Westword), One Track Mind!

To give you a sampling of the nerdy trash talking you’ll witness between Westword’s nerdy-nerds and Donnybrook’s nerdy-nerds, I’ve conducted a fair and unbiased interview with none other than Westword’s own Cory Casciato.

Question the First: Why do you guys suck so hard?

We do everything as hard as we can. Surprisingly, it turns out sucking is one of the few things we can barely manage. But we heard you guys are champion suckers, so congratulations on that.

Sheeit. We have servants who do that for us. So you “say” you are creating a “trivia team” to “compete” against Donnybrook’s team. We are concerned. What kinds of credentials (degrees, affiliations, certifications) do your teammates hold to make them worthy of our competition?

A prerequisite for our team was a BS in BS. So there’s that.

In the olden times, when Donnybrook was a young pup, it was customary for the loser of the competition to be shanked with swords through the ears so as to prevent their inferior brains from wreaking havoc on the world any longer. You guys wanna do that this time or should we just nix that? It seems kind of antiquated.

You really want to be shanked by swords? I mean, okay, if that’s what you want. You bring the swords though. I know you high-class types prefer fencing foils. I think we only have one guy with a cutlass and I have a machete which is usually reserved for killing zombies, so…

A machete will work. So here’s some music trivia: what’s the best song to lose a trivia competition to?

Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust.” I’ve specifically requested Geeks Who Drink make a special edit mentioning Donnybrook by name. You’re welcome.

Our team has a ball boy/fluffer servant who squirts our faces with water when we get hot and massages our shoulders when we’re tired. He also changes spare tires. Does your team have that?

No, but if you’d like to wager him, we’ll have one for the next time someone is stupid enough to challenge us.

If we lose, we won’t have him to wager, because we will all commit Seppuku (servants too). Will you be bringing protective gear? Because we plan on firing mind-darts of knowledge all over your faces!

Meh. Feeble minds fire feeble mind darts. I think we’ll be fine.

We will be giving whomever wins the Westword Music Knowcase a pat on the back. So we will be patting ourselves on the back. What service will you provide to the winners of the Westword Music Knowcase?

We service ourselves all the time, so nothing out of the ordinary.

Well, there you have it! I think it’s clear who will win this round. Make sure to put your thinking/drinking caps on and come to the Snug this Sunday!

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About the Author

Angora Holly Polo

Angora Holly Polo is the Czar of Donnybrook Manor, moderator of leisure, purveyor of intrigue. You may email her offerings of gold at GoDonnybrook@Gmail.com.

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4 Comments on "Westword Music Writer Cory Casciato"

  1. Professor Honeydew June 9, 2010 at 2:05 pm · Reply

    I wish I could say that we have a goal of making Cory cry, but seeing as he’s always whimpering on about something or other, it isn’t really an accomplishment.

    Come to think of it, he really hasn’t had a dry eye since 98 Degrees disbanded.

    Oh well–I suppose if I had to work for a “print publication” (I hear it’s kind of like the Internet, but on paper and less relevant), I’d be depressed all the time, too.

  2. Cory Casciato June 9, 2010 at 5:11 pm · Reply

    Whatever, Melonhead. You’re just jealous that readers (not that you all have any readers, but I digress) can’t wrap their fish in your writing. It’s a mark of distinction.

    And to be fair, everyone has been a little teary since 98 Degrees disbanded. Music hasn’t been the same since.

  3. Professor Honeydew June 14, 2010 at 5:42 pm · Reply

    This post is much funnier now that… you know… we raped you with knowledge.


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