Denver’s Most Fuckable Rockstars

Haileysawesome A New Weekly column by Ivyy Goldberg, with careful deliberation by the Donnybrook Board of Trustees

Ahhh Denver. The site of the National Headquarters of the Donnybrook Writing Academy just happens to be in a city that has a rich cultural and musical underground, teeming with talented lovely young people. And by talented lovely young people, I clearly mean fuckable musicians.

With so many, though, a girl or guy could get a little lost. Help us, Ivyy, you say? I’m one step ahead of you, kids….. every other week I’ll be profiling the week’s most fuckable rockstar, and maybe telling you where to find him or her.

Ok everybody, raise your hand if you’re intimidated by hot female rockstars. Good, good, me too. Ok, now raise your hand if you’re also totally turned on by hot female rockstars. Yup.

This photo was taken by Andrew Tonkery, who went from shooting Denver bands to stars like Gwen Stefani, riding in private jets and shit.

Allow me to introduce you, then, to Hayley from Monofog.

Name: Hayley

Band: Monofog, lead singer

Status: A little bird saw a ring on her finger recently…

Why she’s this week’s most Fuckable Rockstar: She brings the rock. She brings the sexy. She brings the bitch (onstage, at least). These 3 qualities always test very highly with the Academy’s panel of Experts in Fuckablility.

Probable Lovemaking Style: “I wanna feel like I’ve been kissed raw. I wanna do it wrong, then do it again.” These are Hayley’s opening lyrics to “No Proper Nouns” off Monofog’s 2007 album Runner. Need we say more?

Where to find her: The Academy’s research assistants are SO FIRED. They couldn’t find any info on when Monofog might next be playing!! So go buy their album, instead. Then listen to it, loudly, while looking at pictures of Hayley.

Photo by Doug Beam

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The Donnybrook Writing Academy

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3 Comments on "Denver’s Most Fuckable Rockstars"

  1. Anonymous November 21, 2007 at 3:14 pm · Reply

    If this were the 70′s I’d offer Hayley a ride in my Camaro and split a case of Coors with her because she’s a stone cold fox. Quite worthy of the ding-a-ling.

  2. The Non-Rapping JZ November 21, 2007 at 4:01 pm · Reply

    Hayley can also be found as a guest vocalist on the upcoming Bad Luck City CD.

  3. Angora November 25, 2007 at 8:28 pm · Reply

    Wow, she really does look stretched out in that second photo. Was I drunk when I resized it? On ecstasy? Sorry Doug!

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