Home Design Ideas From My Insane Dreams, Items #1 and #2
I used to have horrible nightmares, but when I entered my more responsible adult bill-paying phase, like a light switch, my dreams became intensely, ridiculously euphoric. Maybe it’s because I stopped doing drugs, and my brain needed to uphold the same percentage of time spent hallucinating. Maybe it was all this talk about Donnybrook Manor and the life I’m creating around me, taking on a physical presence (but in dreams). For whatever reason it happened, it rules:
Lounging on pillowy couches surrounded by loved ones, in a sunlit field in the summertime; trying on the most gorgeous dresses in the world as tiny kittens toddle around me in every direction; cuddling blissfully with tiny sleeping babies; lying in the grass on ecstasy (literally, I took ecstasy pills in my dream) and watching the stars explode into a fireworks show. These dreams are so girly and orgasmic, I actually laugh at myself when I wake up. What a loser!
But the most vivid ones are my house dreams. Feel free to start psychoanalyzing me now. I dream of huge crystal towers that are stacked so high you become dizzy; entire cities that fit into one vast, never-ending structure. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was totally dreaming about a Phalanstère: a self-contained Utopian community in one huge building. Commie!
Most people would ignore their druggy dreams, but being Donnybrook (anything is possible!), we’re totally going to attempt these home design ideas once Donnybrook Manor is a reality:
1.) The Shower of Terrifying Exhilaration
I had a dream about Donnybrook Manor where the shower was inside of a one-way mirror cube that you could see out of but not into. It was a free-standing, second-story column much like an elevator, so you were essentially floating while you showered with a view of the whole foyer/building. Imagine being totally naked, showering, and feeling like everyone can see you! But they CAN’T! Or maybe we can turn the one-way mirror off sometimes just to fuck with people. GOTCHA!
2.) The Study
I want to have at least one room with a blackboard across the entire wall, and strange and scary equations written across the entire thing so we look really smart. If anyone visits, I’ll have the butler tell them to meet me in the study, where I’ll be standing in front of the blackboard wearing bulky spectacles, lost in thought until the fifteen minute mark, at which point I’ll say “Sorry, I was just on the brink of reconciling quantum mechanics with the theory of relativity. And it doesn’t even involve string theory, can you believe it?! What was it you stopped by for again?”