Paranormal Activity Bore

Written by  //  October 30, 2012  //  Cinematical, The Theatre  //  1 Comment

It’s Halloween; do you know what that means?  A proverbial crapton of horror movies released.

I’m a fan of horror movies, especially “found footage” and all that jazz. So, when I saw the trailer for Paranormal Activity 4… I got a bit giddy.  The first and second installments of the franchise actually frightened me while sitting in the theatre and, to me that is the sign of any good horror film.   But, the third one felt a bit lacking. Don’t get me wrong, it was good. I jumped a few times but it just didn’t feel whole. It was almost as if they were trying to milk the franchise (what film-studio in their right mind would do that?!).  I just wanted more! Despite the third being a tad lack-luster, I was going into this fourth with high hopes.  The buzz was that it was horrifying and “the best Paranormal Activity yet.” This is a lie; the commercial is lying to you. It’s not worth the price of admission.

Paranormal Activity Four

The movie follows the same format as its predecessors but does so with not as much gusto. “Hey, something creepy just happened.  Let’s set up cameras around the house and not tell anyone about it.”   I really wanted to like this film but there were just certain parts that just screamed product placement and seemed forced.  Anytime they mentioned the Xbox 360 Kinect… I just felt like screaming (and not in a scared way).   The thing that might have given me the most creeps was the fact that they tried to sexualize a 15 year old girl.  I’d probably consider her the main character because she is one of the key factors in driving the plot forward but putting her in really short pajama shorts and having sexual references made nearly every time she and her boyfriend are together just seemed to be a bit much.

Paranormal Activity Four

So, here’s a brief plot synopsis for those of you who want a taste:

Children are creepy.  Also, if you buy an Xbox 360 Kinect and turn off the lights and turn on night vision, you can see the tracking dots used to play.  Also, Toby still isn’t fucking around and is out for all of your souls.

Paranormal Activity Four

The ending of course left me wanting more and only made more questions pop up.  It ended (as the other movies did) short of the actual climax of the film and just left us with a few mini-climaxes. It was disappointing to say the least.  But, it does set up Paranormal Activity 5 which is scheduled to release in October of 2013.  These movies are fast, cheap, easy to make and delve into peoples deepest fears.  Of course they will stretch it out as long as possible.

So, overall…don’t go see this movie in theaters.  Watch it when it comes out on DVD, Bluray or stream it or whatever you kids are watching stuff on nowadays.

About the Author

Ace Wellington The Third

Zachary Flanagan, aka Ace Wellington The Third, is a writer based in Northern Virginia. As a film critic for Donnybrook he is "Ace Wellington" a mild mannered novelist by day and swashbuckling, nazi fighting, sex God by night - All the while filling you in on his favorite televised cinematic adventures. Follow Zach on Twitter @ZacharyFlanagan

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One Comment on "Paranormal Activity Bore"

  1. Maximillian Archimedes Stoneburner
    Maximillian Archimedes Stoneburner November 1, 2012 at 10:59 pm · Reply

    I hope in #5 they can have the parents not be fucking idiots… Again…

    “No, honey, we don’t need to look at the video of you almost dying… Lets go back to bed…”

    That being said… So glad to see Katie again… Sigh…

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