Pink Politics; Primero Parte

Forgive me, Loyal Leisurites – you surely don’t paw these pages to be lambasted with lameness taking form of Uncy Sid’s rants about things other than travel, imbibements, cultural stewardship, and tedious self-promotion.

However.

Dire times inspired my mind, I find – time to inscribe a line. This, the first of a mercifully-broken-apart series; I can only hope, will be tolerated adequately to conjure thoughts within y’all’s nuggets:

A sigh, at times, seems even too much to muster. I can’t take what’s happening; can’t figure it out or fix it or explain it to myself in a way that makes sense.
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Somewhere in the neighborhood of 85% of Americans think that the country is on the ‘wrong track’ – fed up with Bush and his slash & burn policies, the absurd war, the swiss-cheesed economy, the lies perpetrated in the name of defense, the scandals and miscarriages of justice, the erosion of civil rights, the fake fear and the deplorable state of our healthcare and education systems when compared to any other similar country.
One candidate up for election has voted in concert with the current President and perpetuated the agenda that caused the current state of affairs 90% of the time.
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Another candidate has not.
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I don’t feel much like getting into differences, or platform statements, or specifics. Call me lazy, call me biased, call me simplistic. Also, call me math-challenged; because what I cannot figure – no matter how deep I go into polls, and single-issue voters, and the unthinkable notion of ‘undecideds’ – is how a populace that is 80% dissatisfied with a trend, faced with these two choices [this is America, after all – we are only Coke or Pepsi, on-or-off-the-island, love-it-or-leave-it – any more than two choices will short-circuit our Applebee Cortex] – can’t be favoring one candidate by at least 70%. Nothing adds up. Nothing makes sense.
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Now.
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There are a few ‘granteds’ out there – horseshit single-issue voters who should set themselves on fire; whose minds are so feeble and obsessive that the entire universe could be wading neck-deep in fiery diarrhea, with dogs eating the entrails out of still-living children in a post-apocalyptic nightmare where salt is the most valuable commodity and baby-rape the best entertainment; so long as faggots don’t marry each other, or Israel doesn’t cede a centimeter of its fake border, or the government doesn’t dare enact legislation to make automatic weapons difficult to obtain.

Granted, I say to those types. They aren’t influenced by policy wonkery, or voting records on something that might actually impact their day-to-day lives, or even [shudder] reality. They vote with the single-mindedness of a Terminator [but not the actual Terminator/Governor – who is a progressive and considerate scholar of political science compared to these nutcases] – unable to comprehend the notion that more than one issue could matter, or that issues could even be ranked with regards to severity or influence (thousands will die in an unnecessary and costly war, you will starve to death in your foreclosed home, two people you have never met will enter into a civil contract so that they can visit each other in the hospital – it’s all about the same, really).

They are the worst of us. But they exist, and – luckily – they vote! Usually in greater percentages and more often than the “regular” citizenry.

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So that brings your numbers out of whack a bit, I get it. Let’s say those people could somehow sway a vote by 5%. Hell, say 7%. Let’s say they took our national average of 85% dissatisfied with status quo, and we had to bracket however they vote to end up with 75% of people are dissatisfied AND willing to vote outside of their single, embarrassingly-indicative-of-psychoses-and/or-inability-to-consider-more-than-one-thing minds. This would tell me that if one candidate represented a 90% continuation of status quo, and one did not, that the candidate who did not represent a continuation would lead in the polls at around 70%.
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But this is America, folks. Not just the only democracy on earth that (thanks to its ignorance, fear, short-attention-span, and inability to read or research) is limited to a two-party-and-by-god-no-more system – but one where we, as a people, can see truth, sense reality, understand that common sense and logic exist – and refuse to use them.
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Fuck facts. I’ll take you outside and whip yer socialist ass, bitch. This is ‘Mer’ca – and we don’t take no muss! Including muss that is invented by those who intend to exploit us and our foolhardy folksiness. Here’s why facts – and logic – don’t matter:

Trickle-down economics doesn’t work. It’s had 40 years to ‘trickle’ and nothing’s happened. Poor people receive less assistance, lower wages, less access to healthcare, more scrutiny, and work harder for less under the status quo, Republicans. It’s a fact. But, as I said – fuck facts. Republicans can consistently count, without concern, on a base-level support of poor white ignorant fucks who have been told that the GOP is about “values” – and that’s enough to warm these people up. The same people that will categorically suffer more under Republican rule will continue to vote for them. At least the white ones. Why?

1.) Republicans ‘Own’ Values [specifically, branded “American”, “small-town” values]

The real ‘value’ that the Ruling Right owns, of course, is privatized profits. No-bid contracts in two-billion-dollar-a-week wars, tax dodges, capital gains, and the like. Don’t get me wrong – these bubbas on the ground, pumping gas, date-raping, getting their legs blown off in Afghanistan – these poor crackers are ‘the Right’. But they don’t get to “rule” shit. They fix mufflers and clean piss off of mirrors and drive semis across our great nation methed outta their Toby-Keith-worshipping minds. But they don’t reap financial benefits of any kind – other than an occasional tax break. Very occasional, and very inconsequential – because this demographic doesn’t make shit for money anyway. They’ve yet to see or feel ‘trickle-down’, they don’t feed or significantly impact the stock market, they get fisted by the Hand they elect. Because they are told that they are the ‘fabric’, the ‘backbone’ of this country. Maybe they are, in a cog-like sense. Sure. But they get no reward. Like poverty-and-disease-stricken Christians hoping for a ‘better time in the Next World’, these people boldly step up, with a ruddy smile and hearty handshake, and get face-fucked by the GOP because it’s all they have to believe in. Nothing feels right. Nothing’s ‘better’ or ‘safer’ or ‘easier’ for these poor assholes, but because some millionaire dipshit with a pocket full of mini-van and Campbell’s soup tales can remind them that, through all the unrelenting suckness, they are what makes this country great – well, then, shit. You got my vote, sir.
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“Values” are ill-defined and meaningless in the real world. Anyone who has ever, say, read a book or can remember anything that happened on the world stage with accurate recall can tell you this. That’s why they’re such a great tool, and so tremendous for the Right to own. Once you lay claim to having “traditional, American values” – you don’t really have to explain what the fuck they are. The idea will subjectively resonate with the least-educated people who hear the term. The American ‘traditions’ of slavery, or secret wars, or nearly-incomprehensible greed, or tapestry of deception – those probably don’t come to mind when we hear about “Values”.  And tied in with values, of course, is religion.

But that’s for the next installment.

adios, suckheads!