Sean and Nathaniel from 3Oh!3

Photos by Sarah Cass.

Okay Snobs, I have a confession: I listen to commercial radio. Call me a culture whore, a tool of society, I just don’t fucking care, I loves me some KTCL 93.3. They unabashedly play mid-1990s nostalgia ballads, they shun Nickelback (as everyone should, really), the DJs know when to shut the hell up, and in between the crap they (admittedly) play most of the time you can hear a jewel or two. Like this new song about Helen Keller and not trusting hos. This new song doesn’t just speak the truth (one really can’t trust a ho these days): it’s catchy, danceable, and it’s done by some Colorado boys. What? Yes. Le. Sigh. Consider me twitterpated.

This week’s Most Fuckable Rockstar is Rockstars are….

Sean and Nathaniel from 3oh!3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That’s right, both of ‘em. You can’t force me to choose between them. They’re both cute, funny, talented, and pop-tastic. I want to be the main ingredient in a 3Oh!3 sandwich. Yeah, I said it.

Name: Sean and Nathaniel

Band: 3Oh!3

Status: You know what? I don’t effing care. This is my world I write about, and in my world 3Oh!3 is single and has 10-inch…brains. You know, to be really smart.

Why They’re This Week’s Most Fuckable Rockstar: Not because they’re just getting big and Donnybrook wants to shamelessly ride their coattails. Nope, that’s not it at all. (Hey, 3Oh!3! Call us, guys, we’ll totally write favorably about you if you mention our website on air or something!)

Probable Lovemaking Style: Drum machine loops, heavy bass, fake east-coast hip-hop accents, gangsta costume jewelery… these dudes definitely drink 40s of Olde English on front stoops. And fuck (excuse me, make love) in back alleys. Hot.

Possible Drawbacks: Well, they’re based out of Boulder, CO. So if you like the stink of patchouli then there are no drawbacks. For those of us who aren’t damn dirty hippies, however, this might be a problem.

Where You Can Find Them: 3Oh!3 plays Denver on June 29th at the Warped tour. Brave the clusters of skater-kids and the crappy headliners if you dare. Also, their record releases July 8th. So there’s that, too.