The Problem of Leisure: Angora’s Farewell
Last Monday I was discovered by a very influential member of a secret agency while in front of Donnybrook Maison, wearing not much more than a Russian ushanka hat and pearls, barking at my servant who was shoveling the walk. It was daybreak, and I was dead drunk.
It turns out this white-blonde mustacchiod man had some interest in one Benjamin “Benny” Burwell St. Maur, and was stalking the grounds swearing vengeance upon him and all his illegitimate children on behalf of Switzerland.
My appearance seemed to calm the man. I’m not sure if it was my womanly figure or my inability to scale the icy walk in my heels, drunk…but the man had a smile like the servants get when I finally feed them after forced fasting.
We made a compromise in which I would be hired on as a secret agent of sorts in exchange for the man leaving Benny be. It confused me that the man said my absence would force Benny to pay him back. I’m sure he meant the other way around. I dressed, thinking of my selflessness; and we boarded a train to Switzerland and the man was so happy, he was cackling the whole time.
So I will be away for who knows how long, loves. So far the job is great; they haven’t unshackled me yet, but I can’t wait to implement some changes in this dreadful secret agency. I will try to write as often as possible, but you will hear from me less. Don’t cry.
In the meantime, Donnybrook, what shall you be doing while I’m gone?
Dinosaur Jr.’s set at the Westword fest in June was so bowel-shakingly loud that’s it’s difficult to imagine the band playing indoors, but tonight’s show at the Odgen Theatre will prove new depths (and heights) of sonic insanity. The original trio of J. Mascis, Murph and moppy-haired Sebadoh/Folk Implosion god Lou Barlow have been scorching the country with classics from “Green Mind,” “You’re Living All Over Me” and other albums, living up their original renown despite the fact that J.’s hair is now the color of Columbian cocaine.
Forget the aggressively shitty openers Awesome Color (they’ve sucked every time I’ve seen them, although I’m not familiar with the other guys, Hate Fuck Trio, who may or may not be pretty good) and get there to witness an indie rock fossil that rocks so incredibly hard at this improbable stage of its on-again/off-again career. Yeah.
There are 2 shows this weekend to support the Girls Rock Camp Alliance–an international coalition of programs that teach girls how to start bands and groups. And seriously, what’s more badass than girls who can rock’n'roll.
The shows are as follows:
Friday at Brooks Center for the Arts (1400 Williams) 7 PM
There’s a $5 suggested donation (which you should give if you dig chicks that rock’n'roll). Laura Goldhamer, Dan Craig Band, Jon Davis, Hunter Dragon, and Jumbo Special. They’re also raffling off a Fender Squire Stratocaster. Anyone who donates is eligible. I hear there will be other fun giveaways.
Saturday at Lion’s Lair there’s a 9:00 show and for just $5 you can see The Future is Broken, Cordite, Destriere, and Creepskope. I recommend showing up early for Creepskope. They’re the hottest, rockinest, angriest girls I know. Full disclosure: I have a massively huge crush on one of the members.
There’s also a silent auction of handmade crafts and local goods (gift certificates and stuff) at Fancy Tiger on Saturday from 4-7. Also to benefit girls who rock.
Madden Madrid McClintock:
For old-school local music kids, it must be noted that friday’s other opener for Dinosaur jr. is a reunion of the Hate Fuck Trio. The name says it all. Old-school Denver punk. And they’re saying this is a one-time reunion.
I’ve seen Dinosaur enough in the last year, though, so I’ll be at Meese’s signing party/show at the Bluebird that night. They just signed to Atlantic, and it’s sold out. Tickle Me Pink and Barcelona are opening. The word on the street is that Tickle Me Pink might be the next Colorado band to sign to a major label. We’ll see.
This weekend I’ll be at my house playing Guitar Hero III. And also researching crazy sex acts for an upcoming column (RESEARCHING on the internet, you perverts- get your collective minds out of the gutter. Ivyy is a lady,
dammit!) But if I were to venture outside, I might go to the Museum of Contemporary Art, just becuase I think it’s
so quaint that our precious little city now has a Contemporary Art Museum. Awwwwwww, I luv ya, Denver.
Guido Sarducci III:
Dinosaur Jr. and Awesome Color at the Ogden Theater. This is going to be THE garage rock show of the season.
J. Mascis has been reinvigorated since the reunion of his late 80′s outfit. This is evidenced by this year’s awesome
album, Beyond. This album was more than them just getting together and saying “hey, let’s see if anyone cares.” Instead they rock like the 90′s never happened. Their supporting act will take you back even further as Derek Stanton (lead singer of Awesome Color) does his best Iggy Pop act.
“Thou shalt go see Dan Le Sac vs. Scoobius Pip at the Fox Theater.”
Well, that’s all for now, lovies…send money, soon! Love, Angora Holly Polo