Flexible Pets ‘n More

Pic #1 Clown Face Glory Hole

The question is: What side do you stand on?

Price: Just put $5 through the hole and try to ignore the honking of the clown nose.

Pic #2: Chuck Norris is a 22 Pound House Cat

A yellow-eyed, 22 pound black cat named Chuck Norris. I pray to god I never know the location of this cat. It probably has a beard and carries an Uzi

Chuck Norris doesn’t get lost. He disappears for a few weeks while he kills and eats an 800 pound elk.

Reward: None. It probably got eaten by coyotes. Chuck Norris is fat and old.

Pic #3: Yoga Dogs Calendar

Yup, Dogs doing Yoga. This is the type of calendar you’d see hanging in the cubicle of a new-agey, roller-blading, buys-only-organic-type person, but they work for an advertising agency that represents McDonald’s and their spouse is a bassist in a shitty blues cover band.

Price: $5, but who needs a calendar anyway? Grow up and buy a smart-phone

Pic #4: Broken Antlers

Great band name.

I love how they just wrapped duck tape around it to fix it, gave up and then tossed it in the trash. This is an image of the lazy, half-assed American culture.

It probably got broken at some suburban redneck’s house party between sets of beer pong after somebody tried to duck tape it to his head and “fucking charge at some shit.”

Price: I pulled this one out of the trash and now it hangs above my bar.