The Walking Dead 305: ‘Say the Word’
Featuring Zombie Entertainment and a little Anger Management Axe Play
Last week our group was dealt a crippling blow when we lost both T-Dog and Lori. Lori was unable to successfully deliver her daughter, and Carl was tasked with the difficult job of insuring she did not come back as a Walker. T-Dog heroically sacrificed himself to save (ugh) Carol after the prison became overrun when Andrew opened the gate and let a bunch of biters in.
So we started this week in Woodbury where a celebration is happening. And is it just me or does it seem like Andrea’s peen shopping? I see that saucy little “Cold Cup to Neck Move,” with Milton, Andrea. No one is fooled, Slutty McSlutterson. Milton promises her a night of festivities, and you know in his mind they involve some cock-play.
Michonne still seems to have the emotional range of “defiant stink eye” to “untrusting stink eye.” She walks away from Andrea’s whoring and almost catches the Governor engaging in some seriously fucked up father/walker-daughter bonding time. It looks like the Governor is keeping more than just severed zombie heads for pets.
Rick is practically catatonic at the loss of Lori. Unable to take on the role of a new father, everyone’s favorite masty-fodder, Daryl, steps up into the leadership role. He gets Hershel and the others to secure the grounds while he and Maggie make a run for formula on his bike.
First Observation of the Night: When we’re in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, running into a group of them with an axe makes for an excellent anger management exercise.
With the Governor distracted at the anniversary party, Michonne uses the opportunity to get her katana back. But while she is in the Governor’s apartment she comes across a disturbing journal. Just as she is about to discover the Governor’s secret zombie-daughter, she is interrupted by the Governor, Milton, and Merle who have come on a beer run. Milton is upset with how much power this party is draining from the generators. They leave still arguing about how he needs power for his experiments and Michonne makes a hasty exit out the back.
That is where she discovers that the residents of Woodbury have something in common with the residents of Hershel’s farm. What follows is another awesome blade sequence, and it’s pretty hilarious when someone comes out with a bucket of zombie food and drops it in surprise.
Michonne has an awesome exchange with the Governor. He keeps thinking that he can somehow control her, but unless the show is going in the same direction of the comics, I’m not really sure how that is going to happen.
Axel and Oscar are still trying to make it right with our group. They approach Glenn with their condolences as he digs graves, offering to help. But their sympathy falls on deaf ears, as Glenn is still struggling with the loss of one of his best friends and the guilt at being relieved that it wasn’t Maggie.
The Governor enlists Andrea’s help in trying to reign in Michonne. Even though Michonne tries to explain that she knows in her core that something is seriously fucked up about Woodbury, Andrea is too blinded by all the peen potential to really listen to her.
Glenn stupidly interrupts Rick’s one man Walker-killing-machine for a bro on bro heart to heart and almost gets his head cut off for his trouble. Rick’s gone all crazy-eyed and I’m thinking the only people who can get through to him right now are Hershel or Carl. My vote is for Hershel; Carl’s had enough experience taking care of his parents to last a lifetime.
We get to find out that this “research team” the governor keeps referencing somehow involves Merle and Milton doing weird shit to Walkers in the name of science. And there are solar panels. And wind power thingys.
Maggie and Daryl have the smart idea of breaking into a daycare. Daryl has a moment of the sads when he sees hand-print art with the name “Sofie” on it. Not only do they find diapers, bottles, formula, and toys, they also come across dinner in the form of an opossum.
Andrea totally fakes like she is going to leave with Michonne, probably thinking or hoping that they would not be able to leave. They are both surprised when Merle opens the gate for them with little resistance. Andrea totally backs down and tries to talk her out of leaving. Michonne delivers an ultimatum, and it looks like our badass besties could be dunzo. Luckily the Governor is there to distract Andrea from her sorrows with his creepy dick.
Maggie and Daryl return from their run after nightfall and Oscar and Axel assist Glenn in getting them through the gate. The new baby is probably starving by the time they get there so she quickly and easily gobbles up the formula.
Second Observation of the Night: The writers are milking the “Daryl as a sex symbol” thing as much as possible as they have him be the one to cradle and feed the baby. An obvious appeal to our uteruses.
Rick hacks and slashes his way to the machine room where all the magic happened last week. There he discovers where the baby was born and finds the spent shell that Carl supposedly used on his mother. But Lori’s body is nowhere to be found. Not only is her body not there but there are some suspicious bloody drag marks leading away from the birth-spot. He finds a really fat male Walker sitting against the wall, shoots him in the head, and stabs him repeatedly in the stomach. But it is not really clear that Lori is actually in this thing’s stomach. And I don’t put anything past this show so who knows if we are going to ever be able to see Walker-Lori.
Okay finally we have a part tonight that we can laugh at. The event that Milton was so adamant should be postponed wasn’t just a party. It was a weird zombie wrestling party, starring none other than Merle himself. When the scene first cut to the Governor and Andrea sitting in the stadium my first thought was that these idiots are going to bring on a herd with all the noise they are making. Then Merle stepped out with two others of the Governors men and my thoughts immediately went to “I wish these guys were wearing tights.” Let’s be authentic here, people.
At least they got the fake part right since after Andrea flips her shit about it the governor assures her that it is all staged. The walkers they are wrestling around have had their teeth removed. I bet Andrea is starting to seriously regret thinking with her pussy right now. Or maybe not, maybe now she’s trying to decide between giving it up to the Governor or Merle. I mean, Merle was pretty badass in that wrestling match.
It is morning at the prison and Daryl brings a flower to Carols grave. But it makes no sense to me because we never actually saw Carol die. Inside the prison, Rick is still having his freak out session in the machine room when suddenly an old rotary phone starts to ring. Did Carol actually die? And who is Rick getting a call from? The promos for next week’s episode suggest we will get answers to both questions, and Michonne might finally meet up with our group. It is about time; I think she is going to fit in much better with our scrappy crew.
Photos by Russell Kaye and Gene Page / AMCtv.com © TWD Productions, LLC