Tramp Stamps and The Importance of Oral Pleasure
Written by "Coconut" Roman Coke // June 23, 2011 // Coconut Clinic // 3 Comments
Oh, mighty Coconut, how we beseech you. We need your call on something. Are tramp stamps finally out? -Anonymous
First, thank you for your beseeching. Second, on this day, I doth declare tramp stamps to be officially out of style. So listen up ladies (goes twice as much for dudes) no more lower back tattoos. No more thinking that something tribal will still look sexy when you have back boobs at age 40. I look to you, tattoo artists, to stop inking up girls’ backs. And also be sure to double check any spelling you may have to do. What seems like a sexy idea when you’re 20 becomes a faded and stretched out mistake after you’ve pumped out a few kids. Remember, muffin top goes around the entire waist.
Dear Coconut,
Which First Lady is the hottest? -Drew
Really? Really? This is they type of shit I have to answer? How do you people have time to think up this shit, let alone send it to me? Put down the crackpipe, kids. Fine, I have to answer these, so my answer is Betty Ford. Now, I don’t have a clue what she looked like, but she has a fucking clinic named after her, so she had to be a party.
Dear Coconut,
Are blow jobs really that important? -Every Guy
Yes, blow jobs really are that important. In related news, bears shit in the woods, sky is blue.
Dear Coconut,
Do you think there is suck a thing as a ‘type’? For example, I prefer to date brunettes and avoid blondes.
-DarkHairHunter
I think some people think there is such a thing as ‘type’, but I don’t really think there is. Preferences are OK and all, but I don’t think it’s smart to date one type at the exclusion of another type. Life is a smorgasbord of options, so you would be best served to try that occasional blonde. Hell, my type is ‘hot young easy girls that are quick drunks’ but I will still date the occasional ‘career gal in glasses and heels’. Just avoid redheads at all costs, they will suck the life out of your soul.
You have questions? I have answers. And they might even be right. Shout me at CoconutRomanCoke@gmail.com
3 Comments on "Tramp Stamps and The Importance of Oral Pleasure"
1. Tongue tattoos are the new tramp stamp. 2. Michelle Obama, duh. 3. Blowjobs truly are important, if you want to get your man to finish re-caulking the tub, AMIRIGHT ladies?!?!?! 4. Coconut’s 100% right on this one- redheads will SUCK THE LIVING SOUL OUT OF YOUR BODY AND EAT IT FOR BREAKFAST WITHOUT A MOMENT’S HESITATION.
Have a great weekend!!!!
I have to just interject, as someone that knows way too many tatted up lovely ladies – I think there’s a difference between a tramp stamp and an actual “back piece” I know girls who have pieces on their backs that reach Sistine Chapel like proportions – I say those ladies get a pass. I also say those ladies could kick our ass, so by all means girls – tat away.
Tramp stamps are def. out, but tats, now tatted ladies are foxy. Yes ladies, tat away.