Vengeful Videorama

Written by  //  January 10, 2008  //  Cinematical, The Conservatory  //  2 Comments

Today on Vengeful Videorama: bitchy skinny whiny girls!
[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/MR5xv3pt7KI" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]Sarah Bareilles-Love Songs- oh great, another Vanessa Carlton… another lower voiced crooner whos bitchy and skinny just like Fiona Apple (aka Petunia, in my circles) but just you wait… this bitch is definitely gonna go whore…(see previous posts) Anyway, she’s not gonna write YOU a love song, you asshole, but she will write you a song just to tell you that. Aren’t you thankful she’s not passive agressive about it like every other woman you know??? Well, we here at Donnybrook have news for you, bitch, no ones gonna write a song about you… not Akon or T-Pain, or even R. Kelly (and he has to write a song about everything) Nope, silly girl, you will be resigned to a meaningless fan base of middle class consumers who hear your drab piano chords blasted loudly over some damn commercial for cotton on Lifetime or Oxygen… then you’ll go whore so you can do a video with Akon… [kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/xzhd2Kd5soU" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]

Nelly- In Gods Hands-Wow, speak of the whore… this one was pimped out by Timbaland eons ago… she’s so Helena Christensen in Chris Isaaks video… then she’s Madonna in the Frozen video… the song is pretty, but she sounds so almost country, as if her beautiful voice floated out of the window… God needs to give it back to her. Or maybe not… yeah, I’ll take Helena Christensen any day over this confused tramp… even sans singing voice… I’m sure Donnybrook’s own Irving J. Silvertoad would agree that women are at best when they just shut their mouths anyway… or am I putting words in your mouth, Irving??? Oh well, I’ll bet you’re enjoying it, since you always take it in the mouth…

And with an honorable mention for “Wicked Games,” by Chris Isaak… probably the sexiest video of all time! [kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/XXmlJQN5Pm8" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]

About the Author

Lady Zuzanna is the author of Vengeful Videorama, as well as an African safari guide and music video B-girl from London.

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2 Comments on "Vengeful Videorama"

  1. Irving J. Silvetoad January 10, 2008 at 11:59 pm · Reply

    One, I have no idea what taking it in the mouth means. B, I prefer women’s mouths closed generally, unless it is to blow on the embers of a dying fire while cooking. Other than those three points I am in total agreement. That Christine Isaak is a beautiful woman.

  2. Ironic January 11, 2008 at 7:14 am · Reply

    You’re right. She’s a Fiona clone except there is absolutely nothing interesting about her songs or delivery. Oh, and scathing write-up, VV.

    You know something? My very first concert was Chris Isaak. It was a cool first concert because he was just a local boy that noone had heard about doing scorching hot rockabilly. This was back in ’87, way before that video with Helena and the execs at his label figured out that they could use his looks to appeal to a female demographic.

    Poor Furtado. She needs to fly away like a bird.

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