[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/NQnhVgPr-NU" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]Colbie Caillat-Realize- She realizes quite a lot of stuff during the time alotted to her little song here, but what she doesn’t realize is that her name- Colbie- needs to change. Its not hip or original- its fucking cheese! You go and get yourself a chance to change your name, identity, whole fucking persona by becoming a musician and you don’t change your moldy, pitiful name? Silly girl! She’s a heck of a lot better than Miss Pfucking Psycho below, but not rad enough to make a lasting impression, or a long VV review…
[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/BTU4gv4uIb8" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]Ashley Simpson-Outta My Head (Ay ya ya)- The bitch is back to black smugly eyeliner… So one of her personalities is chillin’ out on a rubix cube- whats the symbolism in that? Maybe that she can’t figure herself out. It didn’t take long for me to mute this one, and she looks more and more anorexic every time I see her. No, she gets worse on every fucking level everytime I see her. She’s in a downward spiral of crap, reaching exponential echelons of excremental expression each and every day. The sum total of a milk-toast record executive’s teenage fantasy. I wouldn’t want to be in her shoes, not for the world. She’s fucking bonkers, and in the worst way. It’s almost like she’s trying to make this eighties-pop sounding track with a Peter Gabriel-ish video– but she fails miserably, as I would expect. This is the lamest shit I’ve heard in a long time. Come back, Jessica! Come save your seester! Where the ef is her hot sis anyway? She needs to help li’l Simpson out, but she’s probably stuck somewhere in TX, still wondering why Chicken of the Sea is fish.
[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/mOfdIaVF1OY" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]Honorable Mention for Brazilian Girls-Live in NYC performing Jique, because they’re fucking bonkers in the best fucking way, and also, we all want to know what it’s like to be at one of their shows…cuz people get neked- well, sort of.